Soothing Old Scars
by mantisgirl
Summary: Regulus just took the mark and runs into a familiar face on the train to school.


Sirius had left. Regulus was still in shock over it all. Sirius had left and now he was all alone. The pressure he had once felt was now increased a hundred fold. The things that were expected of him… It was enough to make the normally pale boy hover at a new level of ashen. Going back to school was going to be a relief, at least that's what he hoped. Regulus locked himself in his own compartment in the train. The last thing he wanted or even needed to deal with right now were his supposed friends.

It had only been a few weeks since they had finally forced him to take the mark. His parents had pushed and pushed, insisting they'd be so proud if he did. Regulus knew that it was only to show that he was still loyal to the family, that he wouldn't dream of doing what Sirius had done. On his sixteenth birthday he succumbed. The mark no longer bothered him but he could still feel the phantom burn that had been there only a week or so before.

There was a good deal of noise suddenly in the train's corridor and as it was interfering with Regulus's attempt at quiet so he could think, he got up to yell at the offenders.

"Who in bloody hell do you…" he paused for a moment as he stared into a near mirror of himself. His brother, former brother, started at the interruption. "Right then," Regulus said curtly as he attempted to close the door quickly, to get rid of the traitor in his sights. A hand got caught as it slammed close and Regulus quickly reopened it to reveal a very sorry and tired looking Sirius. Regulus couldn't help the sneer that quickly settled on his features.

"What do you want?" he spat out, unable to control the venom in his voice.

"Reggie…" Sirius started.

"Don't call me that," Regulus snapped right back, "You're not my brother, you don't get to call me that." All of the emotions that had been repressed in the past year started to bubble to the surface. The younger boy took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"Regulus, it doesn't have to be like this," Sirius said quietly trying to take a step into the compartment. The last thing he wanted to do right now was cause a scene. Regulus was there to stop his movement though. Sirius sighed. "We can still be brothers, Reg."

"No, we can't," Regulus said opening his eyes to try to glare at the older boy. Regulus had never been very good at holding back when it came to Sirius. "You were my brother. You were supposed to be there for me. You were supposed to protect me. You weren't supposed to let anything happen to me. I was your little brother…" His voice cracked on the last sentence. Regulus finally let his head drop in defeat to all the weight he'd been bearing.

"Regulus," Sirius said softly. He reached to place a hand on the small boy's shoulder. Regulus stiffened visibly under the touch. "Regulus, you know I couldn't stay. That day I left I thought you wanted me gone too..."

"I went looking for you after they left your room!" Regulus interrupted. Sirius drew back a step startled by the outburst. "You had left within five minutes of the fight! I went to go apologize, to make sure you were all right. You abandoned me!" Regulus finally gave into his emotions and a few tears slipped down his face. The boy quickly wiped them away, embarrassed that he had let them out in the first place.

"I was always an owl away if you needed me, Reg," Sirius pleaded, "You know that."

Regulus laughed bitterly. "You say that as if it were even possible to try to owl you in that house. You think you had it so hard being in Gryffindor. I wish I was as free as you had been in that house. Because of your 'failure' you could do whatever you wanted. You no longer had expectations. You know longer had obligations to fulfill the title of Black."

Sirius opened his mouth to argue. Regulus cut him off before he could start. "Don't. Don't tell me I was free to leave too because you damn well know that isn't true. " Sirius tried again but was again stopped before he could even start.

"You left. You left me alone with them to fulfill all the things that you were supposed to do. You left me alone to do this." He pulled up his sleeve to reveal the angry looking black tattoo on his arm. Regulus quickly recovered and practically tore his arm down to hide the Mark. "I…I'm…"

Regulus finally stopped. He was tired and he missed his brother. He looked up to catch his brother's eye. Sirius had never looked quite so small in his eyes before. The silence that had managed to slip between the two of them was absolutely smothering. Both started to say something but neither could actually find the right words. After a long few moments, Regulus took a step forward and hugged Sirius. The older boy simply raised his eyebrows for a moment before reciprocating.

"I'm scared," Regulus whispered. Sirius nodded.

"So am I."


End file.
